wake me up or let me sleep.

I don't understand why this is happening. Everything around me is in fast forward. I feel like I've been thrown inside a tornado, where everyone and everything is spinning as they should while I just float there, puzzled, dizzy and annoyed. I try to sleep as much as I can now because sleep is my only comfort. Sleeping makes me numb from all the things happening in the real world, and I'm almost thankful that I never remember my dreams. Sleeping without dreaming, i used to hate it. Not knowing where I've been while asleep. But now the idea comforts me because frankly I am scared that my problems would soon visit my dreams and burst the bubble I'm safely hiding in. Another thing I love about sleeping is that moment- the few seconds before my mind comes back to reality, the moment it observes my surroundings and decides the setting I am in, my dreams or my real life. That split second of a moment where my brain is lost and trying to switch from my dreams and reality gives me hope and pleasure. Because in that moment I say to myself, maybe it was all just a dream, a bad dream, a terrible joke, but no matter how hard I pinch myself, I quickly come back to reality and my whole soul drowns in despair. I get stuck in a trance, hoping someone would bump my head wake me up and take me away from the place I'm in. This cannot be happening to me. I can hear every second tick, the sound of it is getting louder and louder, making me feel more alive in the real world. I wish I can turn back time. For the first time in my life, I wish I could.